ROB PORTER'S CLASS ACTION SOUP
(well OK alright - chicken soup)

Ingredients:
A Chicken fat & healthy (like you used to be)
skinned to debt (like you will be)
excess fat (and income) goes to legal fees -
or compost heap (no diff)
brutally boiled (in salted water - think courtroom)
and de-boned (financially dislocated) when cool
hack remaining flesh into big chunks
(yeah think of your future) -

........and add to

The Broth

1.½ qts water (no kidding - fresh) -
start a big pot aboiling - add:
½ cup Bulk Barn dry chicken soup stock (cheap & yummy)
big handful parsimonious parsley - partitioned
4 outrageous onions (sliced to ribbons)
4 couch potatoes (diced)
4 crazy carrots (chopped small)
4 supercilious celery (minced like your bank account)
4 litigious leaks (washed-out & sliced thin as prayers)
a bunch manic mushrooms
(crumbled - imagine they are little lawyer skulls - hear em pop)
2 handfuls pearl barley (oppositions' buck teeth, yeah he he - thwap)

.......stir up with a wood ladle - and for flavour add:

The Spices

rosemary
black (like your mood) pepper
bay leaf (1)
sage (older - not wiser)
cardamon
savory
oregano
garlic powder
ginger
salt


The Method

 Let simmer for an hour -
stir occasionally Serve hot with:
(coming soon to this web site)
ROB PORTER'S REGULATORY flaxACTION BREAD -
[buttered thick as a politician's election day promises]
Oh... and keep whistling Dixie while you work!

Submitted by Rob Porter May 19, 1997

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